Rural St. Charles County knows
darn well their farmer wants a wife

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Up in northeast St. Charles County, in that fertile farmland between the big rivers, there probably won’t be much planting going on at 8 p.m. next Wednesday.

That’s because on April 30, folks across these here United States of America will get to know local boy Matt Neustadt and, if they’re so inclined, can follow his pursuit of true love in weekly installments of reality TV.

And in the process viewers also will see a slice of St. Charles County, the rural slice. And don’t be too surprised if this slice is so rural -- distilled into its very ruralness -- that we don’t even recognize it.

"The Farmer Wants A Wife," will debut next Wednesday on the CW Network-- Channel 11 in the St. Louis area. The premise is that Matt will weed through 10 big-city women, allegedly tired of bad dates and the hustle of urban life, through a series of dates, challenges, group activities and, I quote, "shocking eliminations and cozy dates."

The filming of the show last summer was the talk of Orchard Farm, Portage Des Sioux and West Alton.

Matt told me Monday he hasn’t yet seen the show.

"It’s been a while in the making," he said. "I’m very excited to see it. Anxiety is part of it. But I’m ready to watch it and ready to laugh." Matt calls the show "comedic reality."

The young women seeking his affection were asked to perform various rural chores, from driving a tractor to milking a cow. All the while, Matt took mental notes, evaluating each of them, from Krista the 24-year-old accountant from Orlando to Lisa the 21-year-old singer/dancer/street performer from Los Angeles.

What was that like? (As if I had to ask.)

"It was a wonderful experience," he says. How many guys, he asks, "have ever dated 10 women at once?"

Hmmm. The only ones I could think of all died prematurely.

"It was awesome," Matt says. "It was great. But that is a lot of ladies to put up with."

Opposites do, upon occasion, attract, he says, hinting that in the end he found the object of his desire.

And yes, Matt says, working the long hours of a farmer makes it difficult to meet women.

"It’s a lonely job," says Matt, 29, a third-generation farmer. "I pretty much work by myself in the middle of nowhere. But being around those girls made me feel at times that I was back in school."

Matt has a degree in agriculture from the University of Central Missouri. He is a 1996 graduate of Orchard Farm High School.

Matt will be in Los Angeles next week. But for those of us here, the place to be for the world premiere is KJ’s Place in Portage de Sioux, a city with a population of 351 (including our bachelor farmer.)

In preparation, KJ’s owners Ken and Kathy Jackson have purchased a new $1,400, 42-inch flat-screen TV.

"We’re going to have half-price appetizers and bucket specials after 7 p.m." Kathy promises.

The TV crew filmed at KJ’s five times, Ken says. Typically, Matt would come to KJ’s after going out with one of the women, or several of the women. He’d meet with his buddies to talk about, you guessed it, the women.

One of those buddies is Jason Bextermueller, an Orchard Farm High grad, as well as KJ’s cook.
The show’s producers loved Bextermueller, a "big lovable teddy bear," Kathy says.

Jason, 34, says he was initially hesitant to participate in the filming."A lot of people were getting nervous," he says. "They didn’t want the limelight on their little area up here."

But from what Bextermueller has seen in TV and Internet promos, he says, it should turn out fine.

"It has its funny parts," he says. "There’s a lot of farm life portrayed. It might be taken to the extreme side. But everything the girls had to do somebody has to do in real life."

Including, he says, milking a goat, catching chickens and washing pigs.

"It is going to be pretty neat," Bextermueller says. "Everybody is pretty much excited about it."

Mark Warner, mayor of Portage des Sioux, says he definitely will watch next Wednesday.Warner says people know better than to expect a whole lot of reality from "reality" TV.

"It’s something for fun," he says. "We’re going along with it and we’ll see what happens."

Like many locals, Warner was involved in the shooting. He was an emcee and judge at a cake and pie contest during a carnival at City Park.

There was also a Bingo Night at VFW Post 4219 along Highway 94 and a Barn Dance at a farmstead along Highway H that was first scrubbed, painted and given a reality revamp.

In fact, for purposes of shooting, an air conditioning system was installed in the barn.Fred Willbrand Jr., 79, says his grandparents on one side of his family once owned the farmstead where the Barn Dance was and his other set of grandparents once owned the property, a quarter-mile down the road, where the production crew last summer set up camp in two trailers.

"We watched a lot of it," Fred says of the filming. "But we didn’t really want to get in the pictures themselves."

Fred and his wife Geneva went to the Barn Dance.

"The farmer and the girls, they squared dance," Fred says. "A couple of square dance teams came out."

Melissa Long works at the Mississippi River Trading Company, in Portage des Sioux. She has lived in this city, which has three times as many boats as residents, all her 28 years.

She figures she’s got a good shot of being on TV, however briefly. She was in KJ’s during one shoot and was at City Park for the carnival shoot.

"I’m pretty sure everybody is going to be watching it," Melissa says. "Nothing really goes on around Portage so it’s kind of exciting. We all know everybody else here and everybody’s going to be on TV."